Ahh Patrick dear boy

One must apologise for fleeing so quickly after curtain fall …pull?

I had lovely women troubles last night!

The beautiful lady who was to accompany me to the theatre fell suddenly ill. Later, when I took my seat, another beautiful young thing, (sadly, at her age, an alcoholic actress), sat behind me and kept talking of her fondness for an older actor ... not me unfortunately … a Jim Beam? Then another rather lovely lady, but a seat from me, lost control of a part of her body! Which can be interesting. Unfortunately, it was her foot. It went to sleep and for a while, I couldn’t hear any of you for the snoring.

To top it all off, I eventually put my neck out, trying desperately to read the tattoo on Leah’s back, which I was rather hoping would be the title of a long story. But every time I got close, she found her contacts!

Then there was the bar! My God! What is going on? Once upon a time, when varsities where properly run, the bars never stopped! The very polite, nice young Chinese chap behind the counter was most apologetic, although possibly still confused about my question of “Why will it not be open afterwards?”

Another dapper chap in a bow tie – perhaps an architect, but at the very least, a pheasant plucker - explained it was all the fault of a rough looking cove seated behind the bars of a cage. Well! I’ve dealt with him before! Handcock indeed! No wonder he’s behind bars! Tried to tell me he was the Dean! I’ve been to that university before!

So I left! Not the least concern being that it was late and I have another performance to attend this eve, featuring one of our greatest professional actors. Yes, The America’s Cup Ball, with Alan Bond!
Such is life.

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